A bit of a rant, but also need some advice

[Kuukrow]

So, I live in a rooming situation where a few good friends of mine (and my sister) live with me in an apartment.

 

We had a friend who lived with us and then moved out... leaving his girlfriend behind.

 

She basically refused to leave, and I could kinda understand why. She had a home to go back to (Unlike most of the rest of us) but it lacked running water and cleanliness. So we let her stay.

 

So that was... like six months ago. She still lives here and is like the worst excuse for a human being I've ever seen. She treats everyone like they are beneath her, including my boyfriend and I (Who pay most of the rent & bills).

 

She tells our friends that come over that we are horrible people, or that we absolutely hate them and talk crap behind their backs. She tries to turn every one in the house against everyone else.

 

The only reason we put up with her is because we need her money & I am very much a bleeding heart. I hate when people have to live in situations like she did because I've been there, done that. 

 

I believe shes trampling on me & and I am reaching the end of my rope. 

 

But I just got good news as writing this, we have the potential to get a whole new room mate. SO, how do I tell her to piss off nicely?

 

TL;DR: I hate my room mate and need to find a way to ask her to leave without being a bitch because we just payed rent (Even though rent is technically paying to stay there last month with how our lease is). The new room mate will completely alleviate all financial issues we currently have.

[CaptKaspar]

You can't always be nice in life or you'll find yourself dealing with people like your roommate all the time. They will always take advantage of people that they can.

 

Confrontation can be terrifying, but sometimes its for the best.

 

That is my opinion anyways.

[EnigmaGrey]

"It's not you, it's our contract. Please, go."

Alternatively, "We've found a new roommate. This is your notice."

Admittedly, I might not be good at this.

[Rathlord]

Is her name on the lease? If not- just tell her nicely that you have someone else moving in and need her to vacate. It would be nice to give her some time- a month, if you can afford it, to gather her things.

 

There's no need to bring any of the personal stuff to the table. If she asks why you just tell her that you need someone who can pay more and that you're ready for her to move on. If she pushes, I'd recommend just not talking to her about it. Just be firm and set a specific date. Don't say "in a month" say "by the 13th at the latest" or whatever date you can sort out.

[Kuukrow]

Thank you guys for the replies. I am going to be confronting her when she gets home tonight.

[Xydonus]

How much notice you giving her? She may be a bit of a bitch, but I would still give plenty of notice rather than just a "Your out, bye bye!" kind of thing...

[Kuukrow]

It was originally gonna be a month, but we don't really have the kind of money to basically be out a month for a room mate. So we're giving her until the 15th and offering her the use of the room mate who has a car to help her actually move her stuff out. She already wastes his gas by refusing to work at any fast food location near us and instead working at fast food locations 30 minutes away in either direction. (She works one job thirty minutes away, then a completely separate job thirty minutes in the other direction from here. So trans time between the two is a fricking hour. We've done the math, shes paying more for gas than she makes almost.)

[Kajin]

I help my parents manage rental property and I've dealt with issues like that on occasion. I consider myself a nice person and I hate hate hate giving out eviction notices (even if I can't stand the person in question and we have a number of very good reasons to evict them), so I can understand the difficulty in kicking someone out.

 

That being said, though, you really shouldn't be nice about this sort of thing. If you give someone any leeway in this matter they'll drag their feet until the very last possible second. Best to be firm on the matter. Give her notice and tell her she needs to be out by whatever time you need her out. Don't beat around the bush and don't hesitate. If she's as much of a bitch as you said, she needs to be out ASAP. You shouldn't have to put up with a person insulting you if you've gone far enough out of your way to give them a home just for them to spit in your face. I know what that's like and it's not a fun feeling

[Kuukrow]

Update: She just got home I just talked to her. She tried to guilt trip me into letting her stay, then ran out of the house bawling. So that was fun. I calmly explained everything to her. Told her she had until the 15th.

 

The worst part? It worked. I officially feel like the worst human being on the planet.

[syfy]

if she is as bad as you say, do not leave her alone in the apartment. be sure someone is always there to prevent any type of revenge moves such as vandalism or destruction of personal property. be prepared to call the police if she gets out of control

[EnigmaGrey]

Might want to ensure you're legally able to give such short notice . . . if she's renting by the week, then it's probably fine, but if it's by the month, you're probably required to give her 30 days. But that's coming from someone who lived primarily in Ontario, Canada.

[Kajin]

Update: She just got home I just talked to her. She tried to guilt trip me into letting her stay, then ran out of the house bawling. So that was fun. I calmly explained everything to her. Told her she had until the 15th.

 

The worst part? It worked. I officially feel like the worst human being on the planet.

I've evicted more people than I care to think about over the years. I know how you feel.

 

But yeah, do what syfy says and make absolutely sure someone is in the house at all times so she can't damage anything. There is no shortage of vindictive people who will wreck your property for the most petty of reasons. EnigmaGrey is also right, in that you might not technically be able to evict her legally in such a short time. Check and be sure. You might also need to type up an official notice to make sure it's legally sound.

[EnigmaGrey]

 I officially feel like the worst human being on the planet.

Aye, that's just the way it goes with this sort of thing.

It'll pass.

[Kuukrow]

Update 2: She agreed to sign the form, we needed to legally tell her to get out, conversation afterwards is as follows:

 

Her: "I'm not going to be staying here tonight and after this we aren't going to be friends." 

Me: "I'm sorry." -Shrugs helplessly.-

Her: "If you wanted things to turn out differently, you should have kicked me out when _____ left."

Me: "No, it wouldn't have. Don't lie. You would have said the exact same thing then as you are now. Don't try to guilt trip me in to letting you stay, because it won't work. I want you to get your stuff and leave."

 

Needless to say, I got incredibly hot-headed, because I am already on the verge of tears from having to kick her out. Can't handle myself well, to be honest.

 

 

[Edited for double post in same post for some reason]

[tommysticks]

What country do you live in?

[Kitt Frostpaws]

Just a heads-up:

If any money is owed towards her for some reason, ensure she gets that money and you have documentation to prove it, my sister had an utter psychopath of a flat-mate (who also beat the weakest of the four when the other two weren't there) and has repeatedly tried to pull my sister into shit with her uni whilst trying to get her into trouble with her parents for "theft" (the full amount had been spent, but the lass had told her parents she was owed at-least double of what she was actually owed).

[false_chicken]

Update 2: She agreed to sign the form, we needed to legally tell her to get out, conversation afterwards is as follows:

 

Her: "I'm not going to be staying here tonight and after this we aren't going to be friends." 

Me: "I'm sorry." -Shrugs helplessly.-

Her: "If you wanted things to turn out differently, you should have kicked me out when _____ left."

Me: "No, it wouldn't have. Don't lie. You would have said the exact same thing then as you are now. Don't try to guilt trip me in to letting you stay, because it won't work. I want you to get your stuff and leave."

 

Needless to say, I got incredibly hot-headed, because I am already on the verge of tears from having to kick her out. Can't handle myself well, to be honest.

 

 

[Edited for double post in same post for some reason]

You may suffer now but its probably going to be much better here in a month or so when you get a taste of not dealing with her crap for a while.

[Kitt Frostpaws]

You may suffer now but its probably going to be much better here in a month or so when you get a taste of not dealing with her crap for a while.

 

 

And if it doesn't you can get your roomate, get your mother (kill phil!) then head over to the winchester and wait for it to all blow over.

[false_chicken]

 

You may suffer now but its probably going to be much better here in a month or so when you get a taste of not dealing with her crap for a while.

 

 

And if it doesn't you can get your roomate, get your mother (kill phil!) then head over to the winchester and wait for it to all blow over.

 

Ha! xD

[Kuukrow]

This has been the worst day. New update: She went to the office and told them and now I look bad to the apartment rental people. She still agreed to sign, but she has made everyone else look like utter douches.

 

Yes, you read that correctly. She tattled on me. It's like it's impossible for her to be an adult.

 

@tommysticks: I live in the US.

 

@Kitt Frostpaws: No money is owed to her at all. She could try to say it was, but nope. We could definitely prove otherwise.

 

@false_chicken: I know, I look forward to the day when I don't feel bad about having kicked her out and I don't have to deal with her.

 

[Edited for adding of responses because I forgot]

[false_chicken]

This has been the worst day. New update: She went to the office and told them and now I look bad to the apartment rental people. She still agreed to sign, but she has made everyone else look like utter douches.

 

Yes, you read that correctly. She tattled on me. It's like it's impossible for her to be an adult.

 

@tommysticks: I live in the US.

 

@Kitt Frostpaws: No money is owed to her at all. She could try to say it was, but nope. We could definitely prove otherwise.

 

@false_chicken: I know, I look forward to the day when I don't feel bad about having kicked her out and I don't have to deal with her.

 

[Edited for adding of responses because I forgot]

I hate tattle-tails >_>. Perhaps you could all go in the rental office and explain yourselves? Its one individuals word against all of you.

I have remembered this saying I heard when I was a kid: "If one person calls you a duck, they're crazy. Ten people call you a duck, You better start quacking."

Shes one crazy person.

[Rathlord]

It might not even be worth going by and saying anything. In all reality they probably don't for a fuck.

If you feel like you want to keep up some relationship with them, I'd recommend just calmly explaining to your landlord that she wasn't paying enough and so you asked her to leave. Again, recommend not bringing anything personal at all into it- they'll just think you're being petty if you do.

[Kuukrow]

They care a lot more than I thought apparently. They called us and told us that now we have to reverify our income or we have a change to pay another deposit. Of the same fricking amount. It was 500$ originally. But when we went in earlier today, they said that there was no reason to do anything like that and no way that we could possible have to pay another deposit. :< This situation has escalated and gotten very out of hand at this point.

[false_chicken]

They care a lot more than I thought apparently. They called us and told us that now we have to reverify our income or we have a change to pay another deposit. Of the same fricking amount. It was 500$ originally. But when we went in earlier today, they said that there was no reason to do anything like that and no way that we could possible have to pay another deposit. :< This situation has escalated and gotten very out of hand at this point.

Woooooowwww.... I’m sorry. That's ridiculous.

[Xydonus]

They care a lot more than I thought apparently. They called us and told us that now we have to reverify our income or we have a change to pay another deposit. Of the same fricking amount. It was 500$ originally. But when we went in earlier today, they said that there was no reason to do anything like that and no way that we could possible have to pay another deposit. :< This situation has escalated and gotten very out of hand at this point.

 

So... Someone from the rental office called saying you need to pay another deposit, which to me straight off the bat makes zero sense. At least where I live, that being Ireland. Then you go to the office and someone else basically says that's just ludicrous, and they're not talking about the rapper...

 

Hope you got that in writing for them or pushed someone around and demanded answers why you received such a call, and to make sure such a call was legit. In any case it seems to be clear cut to me; nothing to worry about. If you went to the office and straightened things out, then there is nothing to be alarmed about. If it was me though I would be calling them back, but I would only do so with any and all knowledge I could get on your rights as a tenant.