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I wish... Apocalypse edition!


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This is a game often played by my close friends and family, so I thought I'd try to go mainstream (Not by signing with NuclearBlast :P ) and post it here to see what wishes you guys can come up with, this was/is inspired by the corrupt-a-wish game by acex222, but with a slight change, since you don't necessarily corrupt it as much as you just view the full implications of the wish... Bear in mind it might suck, but eh if it does then hopefully someone gets some satisfaction from laughing at me/you.

 

How to play:

 

1. Explain how the wish above your post will destroy life as we know it with unintended consequences! (Might need some thinking out of the box)

 

2. Make a wish, usually a wish that a small child would make that at first seems harmless or even helpful. But in the end it will (probably) have unintended results that usually destroy civilization or all life on Earth.

 

Rules:

 

Only one wish per post and nothing obscene please, don't get the thread locked by being a dick and you must start your wish by saying "I wish... "

 

Example:

 

Post 1: I wish... Clouds are made from marshmallows!

 

Post 2: Thousands of tons of marshmellows crash down all over the world and into the ocean, causing massive carnage and tidal waves throughout the globe, for hundreds of years the world is plunged into chaos as everytime water boils the steam becomes solid marshmellows.

 

I wish... [insert childish wish]

 

Start here:

 

I wish... Dogs could fly!

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If dogs could fly they would chase planes around and sooner or later one of those planes would have nuclear warheads in it!

The dogs owner would be in a jet chasing him to get him back and the nuke planes owner would consider it an attack.

They would shoot the owner down and the country of the owner would consider it an attack and would shoot at the nuke plane.

Its would only be matter of time before everyone with nukes threaten and everyone launches in response and blows up the world.

 

I wish women had ESP existed!

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If dogs could fly they would chase planes around and sooner or later one of those planes would have nuclear warheads in it!

The dogs owner would be in a jet chasing him to get him back and the nuke planes owner would consider it an attack.

They would shoot the owner down and the country of the owner would consider it an attack and would shoot at the nuke plane.

Its would only be matter of time before everyone with nukes threaten and everyone launches in response and blows up the world.

 

I wish ESP existed!

ESP exists! and it destroyed the world!

 

No seriously, what the hell is ESP?

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  • 6 months later...

your sweat contaminates the local water supply after after a bout of heavy running.

your sweat is abnormal,so,when people drink the water, their sweat mutates too.

 

A totalitarian regime now starts bottling the milk, relying on it for milk,then it gets to winter time and they stop sweating.

 

THE END

 

I wish Sword Art Online/Steins;Gate (Anime) was real...

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When anime figures conquered earth in 2053, people's eyes turned so big that we could not use glasses anymore. The only way to survive at that time was to fight each other during 3 seasons and 23 episodes for no known reason. Unfortunately, our swords were too bright for our eyes, and as we did not have glasses, the only way to fight was to not fight. Therefore, with no fight within the Earth, the gates opened to a new civilization, with cute and big eyes, where everyone had cats and died due their allergies.

 

I wish I was an astronaut.

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  • 2 months later...
  • 3 months later...
  • 4 weeks later...

If your computer didn't suck it would be a genius pc. This genius pc would have an AI whom sole goal is to flood the wall street market with trillions of dollars it stole from Switzerland bank. Hacking into the Swiss banks servers the AI transfers all trillions of funds to the states. Hence an economic meltdown begins with Switzerland deploying all of its military to the states to get back its cash. the states nukes Switzerland and defends itself causing all allies to the states to help defend the states. with the overflow of cash the people of the states become the most lazy on the planet and all get super fat hence reducing the effectiveness of the military. Other terrorist countries get jealous and create an immense army with their allies and invade the states. Russia then gets jealous of this terrorist because they wanted to destroy the states first so they invade the states to go kill these terrorist. yet North Koreas child leader gets super jealous and decides to nuke the states from Cuba. and that's when the president of the states gets super enraged and nukes the whole dam planet from within his bunker in Switzerland ( :shock: ). the end.

 

I wish there was no winter in canada. :D

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It's permanently summer, therefore due to a new, completely random theory (named doge theory) the heat-death of the universe is caused in 0.3 seconds.

 

Also, WTF was that story about Switzerland?

 

I wish...

That my wishes were reaaaaaliiiitttyyyyyyy

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